I recently received an email from someone asking how I stayed positive despite living with a chronic illness. I thought I'd share my response in case it helped others.

The truth is it's not easy. I do get down and really frustrated. It's normally triggered by hearing what other people are doing, comparing my life with theirs and wanting more. I have such BIG DREAMS and I want them NOW!!! Right now. Not in a year or two (or three, or four). It's very hard to be patient. I am not a patient person.

There are days I want to scream, to shout and maybe kick something if only I had the energy. Those days I just try to weather the storm, not try to be smiley-smiley, Pollyanna; but I hate feeling like that so I've found the best way for me to cope is... 

I try not to give myself too much time to think about the bad things. Instead I focus on what I can do. Even if it's something teeny, tiny. When I was very poorly it was sticking one sticker on a card. Now it's editing a hundred words of my novel.  Or writing a short blog post. I find it helps to have something I can see at the end of the day, physical proof of my achievements and progress. 

Browsing Facebook or watching TV doesn't help me when I'm feeling down, it's like time and energy gets swallowed up with nothing to show for it. I need to have a project to concentrate on, something I can think about when I can't actually work on it. I can plan my novel out in my head, or workout what changes I need to make to my website for when I do have the time and energy. 

You have to choose something you enjoy; but you need to be able to break it down into smaller stages. That way you can do a little and then go back to it another day. That can be really hard when you're already feeling frustrated. You want to do it all. Get. It. Done. At least I do; but there are some things that nobody can do in a day, no matter how much time or energy they have - that's what I tell myself when I've only edited one paragraph and I feel the weight of all I still want to do and achieve.

If you can't help yourself, sometimes helping people in a similar situation can be almost as good. I set up survivingsevereme.com  and easytoswallow.co.uk for that very reason. I used all my awful experiences of being ill to help others and in doing so I found it much easier to cope. It felt like my time and suffering wasn't wasted.

It's not the answer you or I want to hear; but it really is a day by day process. Not looking any further into the future than this day, this hour, even this minute. It's the best, and maybe hardest, way to cope with limitations. 

What one thing could you do today that would be fun and feel like an achievement? Focus on that, no matter how small it is. Concentrate on that and let tomorrow take care of itself.

How do you stay positive or cope with having limited energy? What one thing are you going to do today? Pop on over to Facebook and let me know... 

I love presents, giving them, receiving them, there's something really exciting about unwrapping a gift. I thought buying presents was easy. Then I got ill and suddenly it was this whole minefield that no-one seemed to know how to cross.

I'm the first to admit when I was bedbound I was a complete nightmare to buy for. I was sensitive to smell, so cosmetics were out. I was too ill to watch TV, read or listen to music, so that was a non-starter. I couldn't go out and it was in the days before online shopping.

So what did I end up with one Christmas? That's right, high street vouchers I couldn't go out and spend, bath products that I could smell through the wrapping paper and a writing set when I couldn't even hold a pen. Total. Utter. Nightmare.

There's nothing that makes you feel quite so rubbish as being reminded of all the things you can't do. Especially at Christmas! I have to admit there were a few tears that year which is why I wrote a post on The Do's and Don'ts of buying presents for people who are ill

I hope it helps you find the perfect gift for your loved ones this year or maybe you could point a few people in that direction (a share on Facebook or an accidental e-mail forward works wonders) to give them a few suggestions for future present buying.

Christmas can be a magical time, a chance for family and friends to come together. When everywhere you look you see light, sparkle and beauty, despite the darkness of December (at least it's dark if you live in the Northern Hemisphere like I do).

Christmas feels very special and is something to look forward to. Unless that is you're ill and your health is making life hard. All the things you can't do is suddenly thrown under the bright twinkly fairy lights and it can make you feel miserable. Simple things like decorating a Christmas tree can be a challenge, if not impossible.

For many years I couldn't stand up to decorate a tree, I couldn't even walk and sitting upright made me dizzy. It was miserable as the Christmas tree is one of my favourite things, that and the food and presents - they were seriously affected too by my illness; but that's a whole other story...

I used to lie in bed listening to my family decorate the tree. They put it on our landing, so that I could at least glimpse it sometimes. They wanted to include me, for me to be able to be a part of their festivities; but I was miserable and frustrated. I wanted to be the one hanging the baubles, getting scratched by pine needles and balancing on tip toe to put the fairy on the top.

As with everything, I escaped into my imagination, pretending that I was decorating the most amazing tree, choosing all the delicate glass ornaments that I would hang up, the colour scheme I would have and the Christmas songs I'd be singing. It wasn't the same as a real tree; but it was fun.

That's why I put together my own virtual Decorate your Christmas Tree Party in your Pad. Taking all the elements of decorating a tree and creating a fun experience which is perfect if you're too ill to have a tree of your own.

Or maybe you're having to do lots of resting this December and you fancy an alternative guided visualisation to walking on a beach? Then this will be great for you too. It will allow you to imagine a special tree decorating party where you get to decorate your virtual tree your way. No having to let others choose the decorations!

The guided Tree Decorating experience as usual comes as an mp3 to listen to and an e-magazine. I've packed it full of easy, low energy activities like how to make festive smelling cinnamon decorations, the story of the first Christmas trees and even some yummy recipes for Cheats Mince Pies and Easy Fruit Punch, perfect for snacking on during the festive period.

It’s the height of summer and you hear the thud as letters hit the doormat. You flick through them and a small, glossy, brightly coloured postcard jumps out at you.

It’s from a friend and she's telling you what a wonderful time she's having, and how she wishes you were there-- and you look at the card and impulsively decide, "I'll DO it!"

Then you look around and realise that going away isn’t a possibility, just going out is difficult and getting on a plane is impossible.

Your heart sinks as you wonder whether you'll ever be able to have a 'normal' life.

That’s the situation that faces so many who are house bound because of illness or disability, or who are stuck going in and out of hospital.

When you're in that situation, all you can do is hear about other people’s amazing adventures.

Up until now.

After being bed bound for six years with ME/CFS I came up with the idea of a Holiday From Home.

I found a way to enjoy the fun and relaxation of a holiday and now I’m sharing that with other people. My first creation of this sort was a full holiday experience without ever leaving my room, where I put pictures up, ate the traditional food and even paddled in a foot spa pretending it was the sea.

From there, I created magical experiences that others could share. Experiences where it doesn't matter where you are in the world or whether you can even leave your sofa or bed-- you'll be whisked away to a beautiful place that seems so real you'll actually believe you've been there.

Just because life has put limitations on you, doesn’t mean you can’t have fun and with my help and a pinch of imagination you can have a great holiday from home.

That's why I'm excited that in August I'm organising my latest virtual vacation and I wanted to invite you to join me. We're going to be setting off on a luxury yacht to enjoy our Ocean Adventure - you'll be swimming with dolphins, sipping cocktails, eating ice cream on the beach and exploring a deserted island on our own treasure hunt.

It's going to be fun and fabulous and you can be there too. Click here to see all the details...

Webcams are an amazing way to see the world without ever going out or getting onto a plane. These are some of my favourites. Just click to be transported.

• Webcams Around the World - to see everything from the Sydney Opera House, Time Square in New York and The Colosseum in Rome. http://www.camscape.com/
• Antarctica Penguins - http://www.martingrund.de/pinguine/pinguincam1.htm
• Sydney Harbour - http://www.earthtv.com/en/camera-destination/sydney-australia
• Niagra Falls - http://www.cliftonhill.com/explore/media-gallery/niagara-falls-cam
• Head into Outer-Space with NASA’s webcam http://www.nasa.gov/multimedia/nasatv/iss_ustream.html

N.B. The webcams are subject to timezones, so they may be dark if it;s night in the country. Try visiting them at different times during the day. Have fun and let me know if you find any other great travel cams.

PS These links are unrelated to Live in Love in Laugh in and ww.clairewade.com we hold no responsibility to their content or subsequent links.

If you read my post Coping with "Big" Birthdays when you're ill or disabled. Turning 18, 21, 30, 40, 50... Things to be proud of you'll know that on 30th March I will be turning 30! I tried ignoring it, pretending it wasn't happening and then decided I wanted to make the best of it, so I'm throwing a Virtual Party in your Pad.

In fact what could be better than a 1930's Vintage Party, for my 30th on the 30th?

I'd like to invite you to join me and the other virtual party guests for some 1930's fun - it's going to be fabulous!

We'll be sipping on cocktails, while relaxing to the sounds of a big band. It's going to be a night to remember!

To sign up and get the exclusive party audio and magazine, as well as finding out all the juicy details on how it works, go here... http://www.clairewade.com/party.html

I'm determined my 30th is going to be a day to remember and I'd love you to help me make it that!

Ten years ago I was really poorly, I'd been bed bound for three years with ME/CFS and I was struggling. There was little information around for people who were so ill, half the medical profession didn't know you could get that ill with ME, the other half didn't believe it even existed. I was frustrated and isolated and I knew that I wanted to do something about it. I decided I'd put together a leaflet of tips for people with severe ME and gather up all the things that worked for me and others with the chronic illness.

It was a slow process; I couldn't physically read or write, I was just too ill. I had to dictate everything to my Mum, who was brilliant. Gradually we put it all together, over a couple of years. It expanded as we realised how much information we had to share, from a leaflet, to a small booklet, to realising it needed to become a whole book! It was incredible watching it come together and know that it was going to help people, make a difference.

Finally in 2004 it was printed by a charity I was working with and they sent it out for free, to all their severely affected members. I was so proud of it and delighted at the positive reaction it got. There had been a huge gap and I'd filled it with a practical guide to living with ME. I heard back from sufferers, from doctors and OTS, specialists who were using it with their patients. The book had gone further than I ever imagined it could!

Things changed, life moved on and I gradually got a bit better, leaving a lot of it behind as I explored new challenges. Now though, it feels like the right time to go back and update the book one last time. To add to it all the knowledge I've gained since the first publication and to bring it into the world again. Not just for people with ME/CFS; but for anyone that's living with a chronic illness, because I've met more people and realised that a lot of the themes and information are relevant to all kinds of illnesses.

It feels very strange and emotional to look back on it. To revisit what was my own personal hell. I'm on the other side and that helps; but it does bring all the horror back. It feels important to do this, not just for the new people I know it can help; but for me too. There's a lot that happened during that time that I suppressed, because I was just too weak to deal with it; but now feels the time to bring it out into the light, to see it for what it is and to release it once and for all.

Surviving Severe ME changed lives and I know that the new version Thriving not Surviving, LIVING life with chronic illness, is going to do even more.

I've been watching some amazing videos by Marie Forleo on business - it's my big goal for 2013 to get my business out into the world. Marie invited people to make a video for her about who we are and what we do. This is mine...

If you want to get some business inspiration and motivation check out Marie at http://rhhbschool.com/ Her weekly videos are amazing and so helpful. She covers such a wde variety of topics to do with running your own business and they're fun! No dull monologues or preachy lectures.

I love that Marie puts her personality into everything she does. It's something I'm realising is not only okay; but also good to do. I always thought business should be starchy and professional, like a bank. I never thought you could actually do what you love, be yourself and be successful. That's what I'm doing now. It's harder than you would think to be yourself, to not filter yourself to be the way you think people want you to be; but I'm working on it! And having fun too!

I have everything crossed for the scholarship because I would love to work with Marie, she's awesome! I know that her marketing expertise would change things forever for me and for Live in Love in Laugh in. As you can tell from my video, I passionately believe that I can make a difference, that there are millions of people in the world who would love and benefit from what I do, the virtual vacations, the holidays from home and the parties in your pad. My mission is to get them out there and into the right hands. With Marie's help I intend to do just that.

Valentine’s Day can be really difficult if you’re single­­. It’s even harder if you’re stuck at home. Instead of feeling the love, you end up feeling very alone.

What do you do if you’re ill or disabled and are unable to go out to have fun? If you’re bored of being stuck at home, sick of the same four walls?

The solution – you bring the party to you and I'm doing just that with my Party in your Pad. It breaks the isolation and monotony, by creating a fun, relaxing experience at home. It gives you something to look forward to, a way to enjoy the day, without having to be part of a couple.

On 14th February, I'll be throwing a Valentine’s Day Party in your Pad, celebrating friendship and love around the world; but party goers never leave the comfort of their own home.

Instead you get exclusive access to the online virtual party area, where you can download and print all the digital party content, everything you need to have a fabulous Party in your Pad.

The party goers also receive two virtual experiences, a virtual tea party in a rose garden and some virtual archery, Cupid style. They come as an e-book or audio that you can enjoy. They are similar to guided meditations; but are much more exciting than lying on a beach. It takes you on a journey through the imagination, allowing you to relax and have fun.

The last virtual party was for New Year’s Eve and we all had so much fun. It was great being able to share the party with other people. It made it that much more real.

“I must admit I wasn’t sure about signing up for the party, as I don’t like New Year much and the thought of doing something seemed a bit of an effort. I’m so glad I did though, as it was great. My family joined in with me and we all enjoyed it.” commented one guest.

No one should feel alone at any time of the year; but it’s often worse during public holidays. I want to use my experiences to help others have a good time, despite the daily challenges they face.

The virtual parties and holidays focus on escaping reality for a little while, returning feeling more relaxed and with lots of happy memories.

To join the Valentine's Day Party, and also access all the other Parties in your Pad I'm throwing in the next few months, then become a Live in Love in Laugh in member. Details here...